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thank you, thank you, thank you! we are learning all of this in real time. the lack of caring for women and their health and centering them must change. the fact that perimenopause can be 7-12 years into menopause is the largest chucks of our lives. majority of ob-gyns are not even trained to support the largest phase of our lives (less than 10 percent). we should all be demanding a whole hell of a lot more.

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Yes! We have t be way more vocal about women's health. They've succeeded in keeping all this swept under the rug because they made women feel ashamed about their bodies and their symptoms. Talking about it makes it visible and normalizes it. As you said, it's a big chunk of our lives that is affected.

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At 59, I finally feel like I’m coming out on the other side. The sweats, the borderline-violent mood swings, the migraines are things of the past 🤞🏻 (though if I stop using my hormone patch, they’ll be back!). I am finally getting my weight back under control— though I will never be “like before.” Now I have to stay vigilant if I don’t want to balloon. Sex drive is still missing ☹️ but I have not completely given up hope there. Brain fog, meh— I’ve learned to accept it, but the hardest part is getting my partner to understand that I honestly cannot store things for more than a minute.

For me the biggest a-ha moment was being diagnosed with ADHD at 58! Of course, it’s always been there… but with the neurological changes that accompany menopause, all my coping mechanisms vanished and I became utterly dysfunctional. Medication and neurofeedback have made me productive again.

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I hear this a lot. Women going into menopause and suddenly discovering that they have ADHD. Or being diagnosed finally. Scary how underresearched women's bodies are

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I learned absolutely zero about menopause, nothing from school (please, I learned more from reading my mom’s Harlequin Romance books), my mom never mentioned it. The jokes about hot flashes…like you said, Ronke. I don’t have a GP (thanks, BC), haven’t had one in 17 years, so I’ve been basically toughing it out. The waves of emotions…the sweats… but now I have no fucks left to give. Beware, world. 💕

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Now that I've experienced all this, I wonder how they kept it a secret - and why. It's insane to think how many women are thoughing it out alone and how many more think there's something wrong with them. smh.

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Girl stuff! Lady parts! Ew!! I share my menopause experiences with my coworkers (male and female) - most of them have no clue what they or their partners are in for!

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Yes. I think the answer is shame. They try to shame us into being quiet by making us feel, women's bodily functions are disgusting

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Amen. Justifiedly angry and menopausal angry also overlap...

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I am constantly frustrated at the lack of menopause education out there. I've not heard a peep from any of my female elders. I feel lost and angry that society treats it like this big hush-hush mystery that even we, as women, are not privy to. I am thankful that you are writing these stories. I am thankful we have someone trying to lift the veil of this maddening "mystery". I am also thankful I work at a brewery where we do indeed have a giant cold room I can walk into at any point during the day. 😮‍💨

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I'm with you Aliah, it's frustrating. And your cold room sounds enviable :D

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Excellent article, thanks.

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Thanks Rebecca

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